Marriage demands a lot from both partners to make it successful. There are many factors that, when ignored, can break even the most vital marriage, and we are not even talking about infidelity, domestic violence, and addiction. Tiny habits that look trivial can erode the foundation of a relationship, leading to misunderstandings, resentment, and emotional distance, and can finally lead to rupture.
Read on to learn 12 tiny bad habits that destroy even the strongest marriage.
Not Listening
All relationships are about give and take and listening and speaking, the emphasis being more on listening. After a hard day at work, your partner wants to come home and vent. Instead of a sympathetic ear, if your partner gets advice, is told anecdotes from personal experiences, or worse still, is ignored for some other ‘important’ work, it may create a rift in your relationship. When your partner wants to talk, give an ear and a shoulder to put their head on.
Allowing Technology To Interfere
Allowing technology into personal interactions can be a silent relationship killer. Constant checking of phones, excessive social media use, or prioritizing screen time over spending quality time together conversing, cooking, taking walks, or playing board games can compromise your relationship. Be mindful of establishing boundaries and not letting technology enter your bedroom and intrude on your private time.
Failing To Make Time For Each Other
As life generally becomes busy with work, children, and social commitments, couples may struggle to find time for each other. The inability to spend quality time together can lead to losing intimacy and connection and, over time, to fissures in your relationship. Schedule regular date nights or spend undistracted time together to cement your bonding.
Fighting To Win
It is usual for people who stay under the same roof to fight. It can be over petty things such as putting a wet towel on the bed, not closing the bread box, or leaving crumbs on the table. However, fighting not for the issue on hand but to prove that you were right makes things worse. Ego sets in, stress builds up, and love dwindles. Next time you want to fight with your partner, consider whether the fight is worth spoiling your relationship.
Taking Each Other For Granted
With time, partners might take each other’s presence and contributions for granted. While earlier you would notice and compliment your partner on their cooking or express gratitude when your partner folded the laundry and did the dishes, now you have become complacent and neglect these simple acts of kindness. Not appreciating your partner’s contributions can lead to resentment and discontent.
Ignoring Physical Intimacy
Physical touch, affection, and sexual intimacy are vital components of a strong relationship. When these aspects are ignored, partners may feel unwanted or unloved, leading to frustration and emotional withdrawal. Small things like holding hands while walking, putting your head on your partner’s lap, or more playful physical intimacy can strengthen the bond and bring partners closer.
Bringing Up The Past
Maybe your partner strayed and made a mistake, but bringing it up whenever you fight, especially if your partner has admitted his mistake and you have forgiven him, can seriously damage your relationship. It shows that you are not over the mistake yet. It is better to talk about it or consult a relationship professional.
Saying Negative Things About Friends And Family
You may not like your partner’s family members or friends, but constantly criticizing them can significantly strain the marriage. Negative remarks can make your partner feel torn between loyalty to loved ones and you. This habit can lead to resentment and withdrawal, ultimately creating emotional distance. To curtail marital conflict, abstain from criticizing them and respectfully approach each other’s social circles.
Suspecting Your Partner
Being suspicious of your partner cheating on you whenever they are away from home for work, hanging out with friends, or reaching home late are serious red flags that must be addressed immediately. It can become stifling for your partner to stay in such a hostile environment and can destroy your marriage.
Avoiding Difficult Conversations
Not all conversations can be about topics you like and enjoy. Sometimes, you need to discuss finances, sex, or personal grievances. The conversations can be sensitive and complex, and you wish to avoid conflict, but not talking about them can lead to a growing divide between partners. Tackling difficult conversations with empathy and openness can help resolve underlying issues and strengthen your marriage.
Having Unrealistic Expectations
Your partner may understand your needs and expectations and meet them; however, it is unrealistic and unfair to expect them to continue and criticize them when they fail to do so. If you wish your partner to take care of the household along with kids, juggle work, and expect them to be beside you for your social commitments, it is a lot of expectation. It is unrealistic and toxic as well. Such unrealistic expectations can harm your relationship. Clean communication about desires and preferences and setting boundaries reduce misunderstandings and conflicts.
Comparing Your Partner
Comparing your partner with your parents, siblings, or friend’s partner is equivalent to nagging and is grossly unfair. Even if your husband makes less money than your friend’s partner or if your wife is not as good a cook as your mother, there is no reason for you to compare and complain. Saying negative things and comparing your partner can make them feel inadequate and put severe dents in your relationship.